It’s funny how fast life turns into pure madness just because you decided it’s time to go. You think I’m hard on you? I wish you could see how hard I am on myself. The level where most people start crying is exactly where I consider the challenge accepted.
In order to not get crazy i went for a simple walk to clear my head. Then I saw it: a stone fence.
Over a meter high, solid and unforgiving.
Five meters out, I made a split-second decision.
Im going for it!
I didn't have the runway. I didn't have the speed. I jumped anyway and slammed directly into the rock face, halfway up. A total, loud, physical failure.
The street was full of people. Most people have a "shame reflex." They trip, they look around to see who saw them, and they hurry away to hide their embarrassment.
I don't have that reflex.
I didn't see an audience; I saw a challenge that had just insulted me. I got possessed. For the next fifteen minutes, I turned that sidewalk into a war zone. I didn't care about the stares or the whispers. I didn't care if I looked insane.
I jumped, hit the stone, reset, and jumped again. Over and over.
I stayed there until my feet cleared that ledge.
That is the only way I know how to operate. If I decide I can do something, the world around me disappears. I have no shame, and I have no fear of the fall. I will either land the jump or die hitting the wall.
There is no middle ground with me!